hardcore is a male-dominated environment — any girl coming into makes a hard, conscious decision whether or not to stick around, deciding whether it’s worth the work. a coming into the scene is going to have a tougher time relating to a bunch of dudes than another dude will, no?

i always have a hard time explaining what it is like growing up as a girl, but most will probably be able to give you a dozen stories about being judged for being too girly/tomboyish, what sports/games/activities they should be playing, or whether they’re going through puberty to fast/slow. from a young age. they’ve already been subjected to that sort of “slut or one of the boys”? scrutiny even before hitting junior high. so every teenaged girl is aware of this dichotomy. and when they discover their sexuality can be a power, and it’s often the easiest thing to use at her disposal when she’s 16. or conversely, to come in as a girl and be surrounded by boys, you adopt their behaviour. shit, just the other week a co-worker told me i wasn’t sitting properly in a full-length dress (that revealed nothing due to its length). you throw years of social conditioning into the mix of a scene that is boys everywhere and hyper-masculine music, and most girls are bound to fall naturally into one of these two category.

that the whole scene does not bring sexuality into the equation is untrue, and kind of pollyannish. maybe for you it was the simplicity of music and stage dives, but how do you explain myspace, b9, guys talking down to girls about their lack of knowledge about the music, making fun of girls who moshed jokes about coat-racks, nudes and all the other shit that was always being talked about by someone, somewhere? i even if it wasn’t part of YOUR scene, it was everywhere, not just in toronto but in every city. some guys actively encouraged and participated, others didn’t, but i didn’t see much discouragement of that activity either from bands, or from long-standing members of the scene (male or female). i think there are some hardcore lyrics somewhere that talk about being passive bystanders.

if you’re quoting bane as if i’m talking shit on toronto hardcore, no. this isn’t about tohc specifically, but about hardcore scenes in general. i think toronto is more accepting than most american cities. all i’m saying is, it’s hard to be a girl in punk/hardcore, and it’s a damn shame that riot grrrl was the last movement to create spaces and groups of women that encouraged girls to be themselves, get involved and feel like they belonged.

i loved and love hardcore music. but it’s not a perfect scene.

also, yes, i do plan on getting a library membership. the problem is, half the books i want to read are fairly new releases. hanging on a waiting list for 6 weeks or whatever isn’t worth the trouble.

I second Jess’s comment.

And read The Diving Bell and the Butterfly if you haven’t already. Short, brilliant read.

It hasn’t exactly been a shining example of enlightenment under the “democratically elected” government of Alvaro Uribe …

that, and read the classics that i’ve never gotten around to.